Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Tactical Alert!

Normally, I don't publish people's private correspondence without their permission. However, as this particular correspondence doesn't contain anything particularly private, I'll make an exception.

I just got the following E-mail from Riin when I got home from work tonight:

From: riin@riinsrants.info
Subject: Re: Sorry
Date: March 20, 2007 10:52:04 AM ADT
To: gelfling@syd.eastlink.ca

On Mon, March 19, 2007 10:53 pm, John A. Ardelli wrote:

> I'm sorry if my comment to your blog offended you in some way. It
> wasn't meant to. I genuinely just want to let you know I'm here if you
> need me.
> I love you.

Look, you need to understand I don't need you. I don't love you anymore.
I told you to get out of my life. I don't want you to contact me anymore.
Don't call me. Don't email me. Don't put comments on my blog. If you
continue to do so even though I've told you not to, it's harassment. It's
classic stalker behavior. Stop it or I'll call the police.

I'm publishing this here because I am firm in my belief that I did not deserve it. Yes, of course I was trying hard to reach her, but I wasn't bombarding her with messages. According to my archives, I've only sent her five E-mails, including the two quoted here, since March 6. In none of those messages did I make any kind of threat against her. All I did was talk about how all this was making me feel and encourage her to contact me if she wanted. That's it.

Yes, I was leaving comments on her blog. Why not? Her blog is public space and, until tonight, she never told me not to. She removed two of them (where I actually told her I loved her), but other than that, she left them up. I had no way of knowing she didn't want me to comment at all.

Yes, I did E-mail several people she knew, trying to find help reaching her, but each person, unless they replied, was only E-mailed once. I wasn't bombarding people with E-mails, either.

I don't deny any of that. My point is, none of it, IMHO, justified threatening me with police action. None of my E-mails or postings to her blog were threatening in any way. I don't threaten people because I don't hurt people. I don't even have a criminal record of any kind, and that's why. Anyone who knows me knows it's not in my nature to hurt or threaten people. All I was trying to do is express how I was feeling, and we all have a right to do that.

I keep archives of all my correspondence. If anyone would like to see the E-mails themselves, I'll be happy to provide them and you can see for yourself. There's very little in them I haven't already said in the blog here, anyway.

It's important that all this be public record because there is a potential problem: before I got the above E-mail, I sent her a gift from Amazon. By the time I got this, it had already shipped. I just sent her this E-mail to explain:

From: gelfling@syd.eastlink.ca
Subject: FINAL E-mail... but URGENT
Date: March 20, 2007 7:46:38 PM ADT
To: riin@riinsrants.info

I will abide by your wishes.

However, be advised, I ordered you a gift on Sunday BEFORE I got your E-mail. It's ALREADY SHIPPED. No FURTHER gifts will be sent, but THAT one I CANNOT stop (I tried).

Please acknowledge (given your threat, I need to make SURE you're aware of this).

John A. Ardelli

So, in case she calls the police when she gets that E-mail (or the package), I can just point them to this posting.

I'd like to say I still love her... but I don't know. I still love who I thought she was... but the woman I thought she was would never hurt me like this... maybe the woman I loved... never existed... :(

I guess only time will tell. If it turns out that the loving Riin Gill I fell in love with never existed, well... I guess I'll have to grieve the death of a dream and move on. If she does exist, and some day returns realizing she made a mistake, well... I'm still willing to talk this out but, after this experience, I'm going to polarize the hull plating first... my heart can't withstand another direct, undefended hit like that... :(

I only wish I could hold her in my arms, just one last time... :(

As Forrest Gump always says: "That's all I have to say about that."

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous9:08 PM

    Why is it that breakup ugliness must be aired for all to see via the internet?


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